Red carpet pics from last night’s Comedy Central Indecision 2008 party. Damn, I wish I had known. Yikes. We were silly to make up for the lack of proper grooming.
My pal Rachel slipped me the actual issue of Publisher’s Weekly that reported my book sale. Reading it made me squeal like a teen. Seeing it online was cool, but in print? Priceless.
But not sleepy enough! Being it’s 2:30 AM and I’m in the midst of gobs of good stuf. Working to get West Coast press on East Coast time is exhausting. But…a radio tour for the Stand Uppity tour is in place plus a buttload of print and stuff.
Meanwhile, check out Christian getting in a “Kung Fu Fighting” joke and “Bad Ass with the DoJo” quote (???) on the news tonight.
Christian also suffers from the Ron Howard Effect.
Tune in to Countdown with Keith Olbermann tonight on MSNBC to see Christian in the last segment talking politics and other awkward subjects.
So Ochi’s Lounge fu*king rules. I’m going to live there. After a week of actually doing just that I can safely say the space is a gem. The sound is pristine, the tech smooth, the space intimate and lovely. Some good comedy happened in the last seven days in front of really great audiences. I hope you’ll come out to see for yourself. Jon Fisch, Jay Larson, Christian Finnegan, Leo Allen, Andy Blitz and other great comedians dropped by on and off stage and you should, too.
Friday at 7:00 is Family Hour with Auntie Sara. I, as I walked to the stage for what I intended to be a quirky two minute bit, spontaneously decided to tell a story. It was amazing at first then my consciousness took over and I realized I was on stage telling a story. Oh boy, did I start getting nervous. It all ended up okay and it was a good feeling to know that I have gained *some* confidence over the last year of reading, writing and increasing my “platform” for the book I’m working on. Considering how many hours I was putting in (18 – 20 hours a day…no joke, sadly) I was happier still that I had my wits about me though I looked a bit on the tired / haggard side as evidenced in the photo at right taken by Maryanne Ventrice in which I’m signing murder . (Me needs a hair cut!)
Saturday night after a GREAT “Drink at Work” show at Ochi’s, we played Guitar Hero. I love that game so much so I’ve been playing it off and on all day today taking the needed breaks because I make my hands hurt by pressing the buttons and strumming too hard. Join us next Saturday to rock out with us.
It’s free, dude.
To promote The Marijuana-Logues at Comix, I came up with the idea to give out free bags of “weed” in Union Square. We assembled our packets with a mixture of oregano, tarragon & corriander seeds, slapped on some stickers with a discount code and passed out over 1,000 baggies. It was fun. Now here’s my sales pitch:
Save $5 on Tickets to The Marijuana-Logues!
The Marijuana-Logues is a “hit” unlike anything you have ever seen. Catch the buzz as the three origianal writers and performers, Arj Barker, Doug Benson and Tony Camin, riff on the rites and rituals of pot and regale the crowd with the highs and lows of marijuana.
Prices and show times are as follows:
Jan 19 @ 8:00 or 10:30 – $25.00*
Jan 20 @ 8:00 or 10:30 – $25.00*
*Save $5.00 off these prices with the promo code “MJLWEB”. Buy tickets online or call 212.524.2500.
It’s been a whirlwind of work here and at least four new clients for me to promote and a hilarious new show to produce. In the midst of all that, I just accepted a kick arse PR gig that means I might need to hire a part time junior publicist to handle my Ballyhoo clients. How cool is that? My baby PR company is the little engine that could! Even if the job doesn’t work out, I will have a major notch added to the bedpost that is my resume.
In an extension of that blog post about the right path being easier and obstacles getting in one’s way when one is on the wrong path, Christian and I had a long conversation where we reflected on my last two and a half years.
When Tex in the City was formed in 2002, I pretty much devoted every waking minute to it. The problem was that it never paid me a salary and there was always some angst or obstacle surrounding any meeting or project. So in December ’03, Greg and I started tossing around ideas of how to start another company that focused on the work he and I were doing: PR and marketing with some event planning and production. We worked harder than anyone we knew and we complemented each other well on every project. Alas, he had a hot iron in the fire and wasn’t ready to commit to anything new until he got word. I couldn’t wait.
Tex in the City was officially relegated to hobby status, but I was determined that I would move forward with my experience in some form or fashion and Greg (and Scott, too!) was very supportive of this. Christian, bless his heart, listened to me brainstorm and reflect on every thought I had and helped guide and shape my ideas. In February 2004, Ballyhoo Promotions was born, just two months after Greg & I first discussed branching out.
In June of 2004, Greg’s iron paid off and he announced his move to DC so it seemed things really did work out in the end. Greg is wildly successful, Scott is now a full time actor landing yet another role and Ballyhoo Promotions never encountered any obstacles and quickly grew into my work from home, full time job.
The best part is that I still own Tex in the City and the website so can still have all of its best parts: a fantastic networking resource and promotional tool for me, Scott, Greg and my other Texan friends. Just yesterday I got a lovely email from someone in Texas who found me while searching for images of Gov. Ann Richards. He saw this picture and recognized me from when I was volunteering in animal rescue & recovery in NoLA after Katrina. Turns out he does lots of high profile work in NYC. Weird, small world.
Tex in the City was great fun and taught me a lot about working in entertainment in NYC and really showed me where my best talents lie. So all those hours invested for no monetary return really proved useful. There’s really no point to this post, just that I have been reflecting a lot over the last year that I have been working from home. I am really thankful for those early years of trying to run a production company and honoring the obstacles that crept in because those obstacles are what made me go in a different direction more suited to me.
Interestingly, in the first days of Tex in the City, the path was very clear –many serendipitous events happened– and I knew it was something good. So when the roadblocks did happen later, they were glaringly obvious. I was determined to keep working on something. I needed to. I had to. I was lucky to be dating a comic around the time I saw that business not living up to its potential. It showed me an opportunity with a focus on comedy. And though I’m still on this path and don’t know where it will lead, it seems like I’m headed in the right direction. Knock on wood.
Lemons into lemonade, as they say.
“There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.” — Oscar Wilde
DVDs of the pilots The Class, The Winner, and Andy Barker, PI were in our mailbox this afternoon. Of the three, the first is the only one with any IMDB message board chatter. Since I don’t actually read message boards (they either anger me or addict me — both scenarios constitute a supreme waste of my time), who knows what the chatter is actually about. Wilde’s quote generally holds true, I think, but sometimes in television all the advance buzz can kill a good thing. So maybe slipping quietly under the radar (Oh hello, According to Jim) while better shows get canceled (Arrested Development anyone?) ain’t such a worse thing in life. Anyway, I will chat about them (or not) after I watch them tonight.
We also received a new digital camera today (Fun mailbox trek — take that rain!) and I promptly began futzing with the settings. Check out this very first photo I snapped (click for larger view). No joke! I couldn’t get that again if I tried. She’s giving a big wink and a smile to the giver of such an awesome gift who also happens to hang out with Paquita regularly so it’s like she knew.
Finally, I am planning on inviting some creative types and/or those in the media, PR, comedy or distribution to join me for drinks to discuss Christian’s CD and brainstorm marketing and PR ideas. In exchange for the time and effort, the drinks will be my treat. I’ll give everyone a free copy of the CD, of course, and will try to come up with some other freebies as a thank you. If you’d like to participate, please email me . I’m looking at a Tuesday or Wednesday in the next week or two or three and will keep attendance to 10 or fewer. If you can’t make it, still feel free to contact me with any ideas or, hell, any other time you’d like to meet. I think we’ll have fun and hopefully help Christian’s CD sales.
Come on, people! Free drinks! A free CD you can give to a step-something-or-other at Christmas! Me! What more could you ask for?
So we got married, blah, blah, blah. That doesn’t take any talent or special skill, so on to other topics of interest.
We missed seeing my pal Mandy of the NY Post at our nuptials; but I suppose if you’re going to miss a wedding, getting bitten by Andy Dick while covering the roast for William Shatner then having it covered in Page Six makes for an excellent excuse!
We also missed our friend Adam Felber because he was out in LA for his new book Schrodinger’s Ball which also happened to get a great review in the NY Times. In a bummer turn of scheduling, he’ll be in New York this weekend while we’re out in LA and Utah. This means we’ll miss the private shindig hosted by his friend, NPR co-worker and co-blogger Mo Rocca at Mo’s pad celebrating our mutual friend’s milestone.
Faithful readers will recall that Mo popped in for Edith Layton’s book launch party. Why? She’s Adam’s mom, that’s why! She also happens to be an amazing woman and multi-award winning romance novelist with her own book coming out soon. That family is sincerely talented and awesome and funny with her daughter Susie Felber adding to the talent pool as an accomplished comedian and writer and gorgeous mommy-to-be. She also happened to capture the (thus far) only photo of me smiling too wide whilst descending the stairs at my wedding party thingy.
There’s plenty more of our friends who we need to congratulate — more books, CDs, marriages and what not — but right now I’m just bubbling with joy for Adam and for Mandy probably not being “too AIDS-y“.
Here are a few photos from the TV Land affiliate’s cocktail party at Shutters in Santa Monica that took place the night before the awards ceremony. It was a small little gathering with Christian performing and Marion Ross, Tom Wopat, Christopher Knight, Adam West & Erik Estrada as the other celebrity guests. There’s a cute one of Marion Ross & Christian embracing. She’s so cute. Gotta get my disposable camera developed for the pic of me & Erik. I hope it turns out!
During the aforementioned cocktail party, Larry, the president of TV Land, told us a funny anecdote about musical guest Diana Ross. While setting up the stage in preparation for her performance, she told a production crew member she wanted a speaker moved.
“Yes, Ms. Ross. I’ll try to do that for you.”
“Now you know I don’t like the word ‘try’.”
How awesome is she?!
Flew home with Adam West & Mary Tyler Moore.
If you had told the 13-year-old, tin trailer living, outhouse using, raggedy clothes wearing version of me that her life would come to this, she would have wanted to believe it with every fiber of her being but couldn’t possibly have imagined it coming true. I swear I wished on many a bright star, birthday cake candle and 11:11 clock read-out that I would have a life & career that allowed me to have a night like I had tonight. And the awards haven’t even happened yet!
Tom Wopat told Christian, “Your fiance is beautiful.” And he was totally serious. And he was talking about ME! Later, I “made out” with Erik Estrada (picture forthcoming) with Christian’s blessing. Erik is by far the most gregarious, charismatic person I have ever met solidifying my impeccalbe taste in men even when I was pre-pubescent.
Marion Ross is the most awesome, touchy feely lady ever.
Adam West is witty and vibrant and clever and handsome. He also lives in Idaho which made Christian bite his tongue to abstain from making a bat cave joke.
Chris(topher) Knight was without Adrianne which made me sad because I think she’s adorable, but he was enthusiastic and gracious all the same.
I fear for this site’s future because I can’t really honestly talk about half the crazy, surreal, jaw dropping moments and, well, what’s the point of writing about them if I can’t really write about them?
Tomorrow is going to feel like the ULTIMATE Battle of the Network Stars!
You MUST go to Tribeca Cinemas and watch these films. Everyone there — and I mean everyone — was thoroughly impressed by the work of all these young directors. One film in particular, The Plunge, was a favorite amongst me and my guests. We were excited to meet and talk with the director, Todd Schulman, to find out what he is doing now because, surely, he is going places. Turns out, he now lives in LA and is working on Borat, a movie based on a character in Da Ali G Show with Sacha Baron Cohen.
The whole night was a success and the folks at Chamberlain Bros. were such a treat. I hope to pitch a book idea to them by summer — an idea that has about a 98% chance of getting picked up by some publisher — just so I can see them again.
Tribeca Cinemas is an incredible party space of any type, but, obviously, perfect for a screening. It’s real downfall is the bathroom. Only one room. For everyone. It actually never seemed to be a problem, but come on…one room? For everyone?
I was given the first two seasons of 24 on DVD and completed them BOTH in the span of about a week and a half. That’s alot of tense conspiratorial television for one person. It has made such an impact on me, I called the guest of honor Roger Corman “Roger Stanton” by mistake. Ugh. Luckily he is one of the most gracious, kindest men I’ve met. He also gave a truly well planned and thoughtful introduction to each and every film and its director. Considering his unbelievably long career, he could have phoned it in and no one would have minded. Knowing this, having him go over and above the call of duty was a special treat.
View pictures of the evening over on Rachel’s site.
Season 3 of 24 is due to arrive Monday. See you in a week.
The Queens Tribune interviewed Christian and I have quote, too.
Although coy about his fame, his girlfriend [that’s me!] described how it is starting to have an affect on national security. During a trip to the nation’s capital, “we went to the National Archives and were mobbed by groups of these teen ‘delegates’ in town for the festivities [the inauguration],” she wrote the Tribune in an e-mail.
‘We’re standing next to the Emancipation Proclamation and they’re taking flash photography, which is against the law and damaging to historical documents. These kids,” she continued, “were more interested in a guy who makes fun of Lindsay Lohan’s breast implants than the document that ensured blacks their freedom.”—Kambri
Does that make me Queen of Queens?
TUESDAY, MARCH 1ST – Sob Stories – We are Family!
Does your Dad have more ex-wives than he has ties? Are you secretly in love with your step-sister? Convinced you were switched at birth? This month, comics tell tales of families more screwed up than yours.
Join host Christian Finnegan (Best Week Ever) and featured guests Peter Hyman (author The Reluctant Metrosexual), Chris Regan (3x Emmy winning writer for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart), Eric Slovin (writer for Saturday Night Live) and Rachel Feinstein (Comedy Central’s Premium Blend).
356 Bowery (btwn Great Jones & E. 4th St)
$5.00 – NO drink minimum!
The apartment is coming together, movers arrive Saturday and big news is breaking with Jest. No time to write about it, meanwhile, enjoy free tickets to a really neat show…
You and a guest are invited to see:
at the John Houseman Theater
450 W. 42nd Street btwn 9th & 10th Ave.
The days of Charlie Chaplin get an MTV-era extreme makeover in New York’s most electrifying new show. With high-tech special effects and comedic pyrotechnics that explode like wildfire, LAZER VAUDEVILLE, blends the arts of juggling, acrobatics, dance, and illusion into a show that defies the laws of probability. It’s old-school entertainment with a totally new twist, and it’s unlike anything else in the city!
For more information, visit www.lazervaudeville.com
“Lazer Vaudeville puts a high-tech twist on the traditional arts of juggling, illusion, acrobatics and comedy.” — The New York Times
“Brings a new light to vaudeville.” –Newsday
“A fantastical family show! Physical skill, comedy and magic combine with the speed, light, and color of a video game.” — The Boston Globe
TICKETS AVAILABLE FOR THESE PERFORMANCES:
Wednesday, February 16th at 8PM
Thursday, February 17th at 8PM
Friday, February 18th at 8PM
Saturday, February 19th at 2PM
Saturday, February 19th at 8PM
Sunday, February 20th at 2PM
Monday, February 21st at 8PM
Wednesday, February 23rd at 2PM
TO RSVP: Please reply no later than 2 days prior to your selected performance to RSVP2LV@hhcmarketing.com or CALL: (212) 501-3769
IN THE SUBJECT LINE OF E-MAIL – Type “Lazer Vaudeville Comp Tix” plus the date you are requesting (ie: “Lazer Vaudeville Comp Tix – Sun Feb 20”)
In the “BODY” of the email or when leaving a phone message, please give us the following information:
Full Name (SPELL IT – if nec.)
Date you are requesting
Number of tickets you are requesting (one or two)
And you were referred by Kambri Crews
This offer is first come, first serve. Dates are subject to availability. You will receive confirmation via email within 24 hours.
Once confirmed, please PICK UP YOUR TIX AT THE BOX OFFICE on the day of the show no later than one half hour prior to the given performance. For more information, visit www.lazervaudeville.com
Enjoy the show!
Catch Ophira Eisenberg on Comedy Central this Friday when her Premium Blend episode premieres at 10:00 PM EST.
Life Inside My New Apartment
Much time is spent daydreaming and discussing what colors, furniture, rugs, curtains to keep, get rid of, buy new …just how do we want this new place to look? I told Christian I would enlist my dear friend Scott’s help. “Yes. Time to call in the Gays,” Christian replied.
So, if you need a matching dresser/mirror & chest of drawers, a stereo, VCR, Foreman grill, microwave, mosaic & iron coffee & end tables or a wicker coffee table, email me.
I am happy to report that Christian is doing really well headlining at the DC Improv. The shows have been sold out and he has been in top notch performance mode. I am excelling in my role of “enthusiastic and supportive girlfriend” by eating and drinking for free, hanging out in the green room, flirting with old professors and generally not getting in the way or on his nerves. Part of why I’m here this weekend — aside from the reasonable cost and ease of traveling here by train, that it’s a long weekend, I haven’t been in DC since ’96 and I had nothing better to do — is because yesterday marked our two year anniversary.
We celebrated with an okay lunch at Smith & Wollensky. On the whole, S&W is supremely overrated. Or at least this one was. Christian’s filet something provier was tasty, but the service was inattentive, my lemon chicken was dry as a bone and bland to boot, and our Bloody Marys were the worst tasting spicy alcoholic crap. On the upside, their salads — both the Caesar and the mixed greens — were amazing as were the whipped potatos. Dessert was overly generous and scrumptious and the price was extremely affordable due to the $20.05 Restaurant Week fare we enjoyed. Would I go back? If it were Restaurant Week, yes. I would simply stick to their specialty: red meat, make sure my server wasn’t sick or they weren’t going through a shift change, and stick to wine.
Having an anniversary that falls during a season of new beginnings affords us the opportunity to look back at the year together, acknowledge our amazing milestones and fun times as well as set goals for the future 12 months. We did this last year, and I’m pretty certain that one of Christian’s goals was to have his own 1/2 hour special (CHECK!) and one of mine was to start my own production and PR company (CHECK!). I can’t wait to see if this year’s goals are checked off with similar success. Stay tuned for January 15, 2006, for an update.
Today we woke up early — well, early for two people sleeping in a dark, cool hotel room after hanging out till the wee hours — and took the Metro to The Smithsonian’s American History Museum for four hours of absorbing our Nation’s history. We thoroughly enjoyed the Star Spangled Banner exhibit. Since 1998, it has been undergoing an extensive and exhaustive reconstruction and cleansing. A process you must see to believe. There is also a relatively new exhibit, open since November 11th, about the U.S. and all of its wars called “The Price of Freedom.” While the Civil War and WWII exhibits were extensive, I was disappointed at the lack of anything about 9/11 other than a giant steel beam and a phone from one of the planes. That was it? Seriously? I suppose more perspective must be gained to have an unbiased and less emotional influence on the display. History, after all, is still being made with regard to that day. It is strange to think, however, that 50 years from now that 9/11 is reduced to just that…a big beam and a mashed up sky phone.
Tomorrow on the Daily Dose: a trip to the National Archives!
Some time ago, 1-800-Flowers & Cataldi PR, contacted Ballyhoo Promotions with regard to Christian Finnegan. I sent them his press kit which contains his contributions to Jest. They loved his work and felt like he would be the perfect match to write the Thoughtless Male Survival Guide.
They were right.
His guidebook is heeeeelarious and will be availble online soon. A campaign is in the works for Christian to make live appearances across New York (and LA?) and conduct various radio interviews in hopes of helping thoughtless men across America make nice and play well with the women in their lives.
Meanwhile, look for a blurb by him (alongside his sexy new headshot) on page 56 of the February 2005 issue of FHM.
Update: See the scan of the FHM blurb.
So The Clip Joint at the Knitting Factory sold out. Did you hear me? SOLD OUT! And not just all the seats were taken — even in the balcony — it was standing room only five people deep. FIVE PEOPLE DEEP! Seeds of Peace should be thrilled. I am. Can you tell?
Stacey & her husband had just flown in. I gave them a lightening speed tour of Rockefeller Center (excluding St. Patrick’s Cathedral — what was I thinking?!) before we grabbed a quick bite and rode the rails down to TriBeCa. I think they enjoyed the show. If they didn’t, they got in for free so they didn’t lose too much.
After the show, Christian & I went to the VH1 Best Week Ever holiday wrap party at Ava Lounge in the newly refurbished/renamed Dream Hotel. I had great fun chatting with Doug Benson, Rob Huebel, Fred Graver, Scott (stereogum.com) and, well, everyone. What a great time. Although, coming in late to an open bar party that has been underway for well over two hours means everyone aged 25 and under is pretty much shitfaced. Kim was literally leaning on people as she slurred and plodded through sentences. I wonder how she’s feeling today?
My favorite conversation was with Doug when he told me Googled himself and found this entry I had written. He had no recollection of this conversation (he is a marijuanalogger, after all), but he thought himself pretty clever. Agreed. I wonder if he’ll now Google himself to find this entry and not remember telling me about Googling himself and how long will this cycle go?
I wonder if Doug will remember telling me he will cast me in his next play?
Gawker thought the show tonight was a good idea, and so should you! Come on down to the Knitting Factory at 8:30.
I’ve got big butterflies in my belly!
I am having a really phenomenal (pronounced “FEE-nominal” in the literal sense) day today. A kick ass new client fills my roster (more on that later) and I’m fielding loads of press hits for my others. Now, if only my fees weren’t as nominal so I could take a long vacation and leave tasks to my employees.
I had all my dates mixed up. Stacey arrives tomorrow, the fundraiser is tomorrow, VH1’s Best Week Ever holiday wrap party is tomorrow, tomorrow is a busy, fun day.
Ho, Ho, Ho!
As expected, tonight’s First Time Caller screening is overbooked. Sorry, 300 seats simply weren’t enough to fill demand. (!!!) So, arrive early to get seating or cancel your RSVP if you can’t make it.
Things are going really well to the point I can hardly remember to breathe!
On the 15th, I’m taking her to this fundraiser at the Knitting Factory that will be FABULOUS! All proceeds benefit Seeds of Peace. Here are the details:
The Clip Joint! New School Comedy, Old School Style.
The Daily Show’s Lewis Black headlines this new monthly comedy/variety show at the Knitting Factory. Comics Matt O’Brien and Rory Albanese host Lewis, Jessi Klein, Christian Finnegan (VH1’s Best Week Ever) and other acts in a show that takes you back to the days when people got dressed up to go see comedy.*
Wednesday, December 15
The Knitting Factory
Main Performance Space
74 Leonard Street
New York City , NY 10013
8:30 PM – $15.00
The Incredibles was a pleasure. It started off slowly, but held me captive in the end.
The Cup Diner is a welcome addition to Astoria. Not a chain and not unique, but the service was hyper-friendly, the food was good and the location desirable. What makes it special? It’s in Astoria, where crystal, gold leaf and garrish lighting go to die. Free internet access is an added bonus.
The Press page is updated, although I’m sure I’ve missed a bunch of blurbs. There’s too many and too little time! Again, intern wanted! Here’s a scan/page of the Time Out NY spot. Do you have any feedback on my format? If so, email me or comment below. I’d appreciate it!
Pottery with friends is good, picking up the finished product together is better, but decorating a Christmas tree afterwards is the best.
“[Sob Stories] host Christian Finnegan must pack a lot of protein because he sure did carry a high level of energy. Christian’s effervescent personality was contagious, like herpes, but in a more positive way.” — So says Tara Koppel of NewYorkCool.com.
The December 7th edition of Sob Stories will include Lizz Winstead, the creator of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and Rob Huebel , known as the “Inconsiderate Cell Phone Man” in the pre-movie commercial and a million other national commercial spots. He also happens to be an amazing story teller. Rob’s last time at Sob Stories, he dazzled the crowd with a true tale about how he, while working for a never debuted hidden camera show on a television network that shall remain nameless, almost snuck a German Michael Jackson impersonator out onto the Yankees pitching mound to throw out the first pitch during the World Series after 9/11. Scarily, security wasn’t so tight. They only caught on after they asked “Michael” a question and he wasn’t able to answer because he didn’t speak English.
This time around, the theme is holiday cheer. Here’s the promotional blurb that subscribers received along with this picture that ran in Time Out NY:
Going home for the holidays? Get a preview of the horrors that await you at this month’s Sob Stories, as comics recount tales of undercooked turkeys, humilating family reunions, lame presents and a host of other holiday disappointments.
356 Bowery (btwn Great Jones & E. 4th St)
$5.00 – NO drink minimum!
Come on down!
My Coolest Years premieres this weekend on VH1. Christian Finnegan will appear in the episodes Summer Vacation and First Time, premiering Sunday, December 5th at 12:30 PM and Saturday, December 11th at 10:00 PM, respectively. Click here for additional air dates/times.
OH MY GAWD!!!
I just spoke to Christian about what to photo shop over the Comedy Central logo in the below pic for our Christmas Cards…his suggestion: Baby Jesus.
He’s going to hell! And I guess so am I since I’m totally going to do it!
Here’s an even better Backstage article by Amelia David published in October when Sweet Paprika had their Premium Blend special. For some reason my news clipping service failed to pick that one up. Hmmm.
In Other News
The photo I took of Christian for Sob Stories ran in today’s Time Out NY. Also, Lindsayism.com got a Page Six mention today. She was kind enough to link the movie screening invitation yesterday. She already gets a gabazillion hits, but this timing is superb. Gawker plugged her plug which plugs her site which plugs the screening. The theater is sure to be packed now!
Thanks, Lindsay & Amelia!
More on the beloved Paquita who is in the loving arms of my friend Keith as I type this from Anguilla: She inspired Christian to write a joke which has been transformed into a cartoon on Comedy Central’s new show Shorties Watching Shorties. Although the dog they drew looks nothing like Paquita, I must say they did a great job animating his joke.
Paquita is going to have to start paying me for this publicity work!
Paris Hilton is popping up all over the small screen in guest roles. Now that I’m in serious PR mode, I’m going to make myself a sex tape. Then all I’ll need to do is get rich, semi-famous and release my “stolen” tape to the media. But, you gotta start somewhere so first things first!
Add to credits: Director
When I’m not browsing the net for girly beard pics of Dave Navarro and sparring with Jack, I’m busy building my new company and working for my first official client.
I’m five days early in delivering her new website because of her last minute trip for a very important meeting in LA. I wish her the best of luck and so should you.
As if that weren’t enough, I’ve premiered the official Ballyhoo Promotions website (what y’all saw before was the temporary installment). I thought it would take me a hell of a lot longer than it did, but I think I’m just getting more efficient and certainly more driven. I think it was the words of encouragement from Dad aka Inmate #1*3*9**:
“How about you have doing with Ballyhoo? Will it get success?”
Yes it will, Dad, yes it will. After all, that subscription to Maxim I sent you doesn’t pay for itself!
In between all the wild sex and makeout sessions, Christian (aka VH1 Poster Boy) and I took advantage of some free Loews movie action over Valentine’s Day weekend. Since you asked, here’s what I think:
Diane Keaton was positively luminous in Something’s Got to Give. She makes it look so easy being natural on camera. Of course, this is highlighted when acting opposite Keanu Reeves, but still…absolutely glowing.
Naomi Watts was great in 21 Grams. At moments the shrill shrieking rage fits were a bit much, but overall she does a great job of looking awful and sad and depressed.
Charlize Theron was utterly amazing in Monster. Never once did it seem like she was “acting”, nor did she rely on the makeup (superb) to do the work. She deserves the Oscar.
And then there’s me, who signed my first official (i.e., paying) client for Ballyhoo Promotions! Woo! By the way, thanks to those who gave me comments on the website. Although it is temporary, “temporary” could mean a long time. So, while it’s up, I would like for it to be useful, informative and easy to navigate. Please keep the comments and ideas coming.
Have a great weekend!
“Belle” for a day, (insert bitter sarcasm here) but a memory to last a lifetime!
After the reading (see post below), we filtered out into the lobby where I ran into a few of Christian’s friends. As I was introducing everyone to everyone, I caught a chick pointing me out to her friend who subsequently looked me up and down in that way that women do. I caught their stares mid point-n-chat which caused the chick to look away quickly and drop her hand as though she’d just been caught masturbating. People still do that? Point and stare? With the exception of gawking at dwarves, I thought that trend died out along with Rubik’s Cubes and Atari. It was something you did as a kid, but quickly grew tired of.
The thing is, I was actually introduced to this chick at Christian’s final Portable Comedy show. She could have eased her embarrassment by a quick wave and smile as if to say, “I remember you and I’m telling my friend who you are.” Her actual reaction made it clear to me that she wasn’t being friendly. If only I weren’t so diplomatic, I would have scooped her eyes out with spoon and sawed her finger off with an emery board. Then she wouldn’t stare and point any more. The end.
My Oprahesque Light Bulb Moment
I was also in a rush to get to the next item on my agenda, so there was no time for mutilation bent on correcting someone’s social ignorance. I caught the 10:00pm show of Hopscotch: The New York Sex Comedy and then did some Tex in the City business with the author, Wendy Williams. During our conversation she asked what rate of success we have had with our press releases. It was then, right then and there, that I realized what a success we have been in such a short time and small amount of part-time work. We’ve been written up in Liz Smith’s column, the New York Times, The NY Sun, New York Magazine, the Ft. Worth Star Telegram and much, much more. Imagine if I could channel all my energy and resources into my own company rather than some Rockefeller Center law firm.
I’m going about this all the wrong way. I need to revert my website back to what it was (an online resume) and put this blog thing on a different page. Now, what do I call my sole proprietorship which will be geared toward marketing and PR and what should my logo be?
I got a pretty nice Wednesday evening group plan together. After drinks and dinner with Tex in the City, Keith, Ken, Nancy and I headed over to meet Heidi and see Bob Powers and Todd Levin in their reading lesson entitled How to Kick People.
Do I, bearer of minuscule nads, have the audacity to critique a $6 show put on by two people I will see again in a social setting? Yes. Because it’s good.**
If it were horrible, then I wouldn’t bother, because why give it a critique with the hope it will get better? Shit, gussied up in Sunday best, is still shit. How to Kick People, however, is just like the nerdy heroine in a teen romance flick, it’s charming and engaging and makes you want to love it. You just wish it lost its glasses and put on a little rouge. Yes, rouge in the latest hue called Slightly Cleaner Execution.
The writing, is as I expected. It was provocative, intermittently uncomfortable and at all times entertaining. This writing, after all, is what I stayed in the City after a long day’s work to hear. Todd & Bob do not disappoint. They are worth foregoing that hour of whatever awaits you at home. Do see it next Wednesday, November 19th at 8:00pm at the People’s Improv Theater. It’s only $6 and so close to Penn Station that you’ll be home faster than a jackrabbit running from a twister.
**And they don’t read my website; so what’s the worry if some two-bit producer / PR guru loves their show but wants it to look purty?
Seriously, go see it.
Mystic River was okay. I hate it when I have the whole “mystery” figured out before I’ve finished eating my vat of buttery flavored topping. BUT, it was free and there were some memorable performances. Next up, Elf.
Attn: Liz Smith; Re: Will Work For Free
Before the movie, I dropped off an extra gift bag from the Ann Richards book launch party and a Tex in the City press kit for Liz Smith at the NY Post. I bet she loved it so much that she fondled the gifts ’til her tiny little fingerprints wore off. And my note? Well, it was so lovely, I bet she read it ’til the creases wore clean through. And me? Well, she was so impressed by my gesture and our press kit, I bet she repeated my name over and over ’til she lost her voice. I’m expecting an email any minute asking me to be her protege. Refresh, refresh, refresh. I’m serious, she is going to contact me. In honor of Liz’s book, Natural Blonde: A Memoir, I went to the salon and got “naturally” blonde with slight bangs. Perhaps I’ll snap a photo tonight.
Blonde and definitely having more fun.
Walking to the subway Tuesday night, I nearly lost it. I witnessed a young girl throw a full can of soda on the ground as though my world is her trash can. An empty can is bad enough, but she threw this completely full can down with force and caused a huge spray of liquid to splash out on the sidewalk, street and parked cars. I said, “What’s the matter with you, did you grow up in a shed?!?!”
But, wait! I did grow up in a shed and even I know not to litter. I wanted to have a show down with her. She walked forward and ignored my barrage of remarks and insults which include such barbs as “Oh, you’re so cool because you’re a trash thrower.” Obviously, she is better at hurling trash than I am at insults. But I did say she was trashy and made it clear I thought very poorly of her and her littering and was prepared to get into a physical confrontation if need be. I towered over her and had my thumb poised to spray her cheap, J.Lo imitating, lazy diva ass with pepper spray all in defense of a concrete jungle that I know and love as home, AKA Queens, New York.
You can say all you want about the “Don’t Mess With Texas” litter campaign…call it braggadocio or arrogance…but you absolutely cannot say that it is ineffective. Started in 1985, it found a 72% decrease in roadside litter in five years. That’s astounding. It coupled hefty fines (up to $500 for the first offense and $2,000 plus 180 days in jail for repeat offenses) and an amazing media blitz which included original songs performed by the likes of Steve Ray Vaughn, the Fabulous Thunderbirds, Willie Nelson and Lyle Lovett to name a few. You can check out all the video and radio clips over the past 18 years here, including my favorite from Willie Nelson, who sings:
“Keep your trash off the road,
cause she’s a fine yellow rose,
Treat Texas like someone you love!”***
(Click here for the brief video with the full song.)
How ingenious! How remarkable this idea is of instilling respect and love for your surroundings and the place you call “home”. That’s a marketing blitz I will gladly buy into and do so proudly. (You really must check out the entire website and not just the music clips to appreciate how effective and powerful marketing and the media is. Read the comments below for more marketing geekiness.)
New York has just started a campaign with ads that read, “When it rains, you don’t go to the beach. Your trash does.” I’m sorry, but that just doesn’t scream at you to “Stop! Or else!” I expect more out of New York. Meanwhile, I can only do my part and not litter and on occasion make someone aware that they “dropped” something and smile sweetly. (The above near brawl was a rare fluke. I don’t think I’ll be picking too many fights with the ruffians that dwell in my hood.)
I believe, in this instance at least, that one person really doesn’t make a difference. I would need to enlist an army, demand Mayor Bloomberg start fining offenders, and make sure there are no excuses for littering by having more trash cans available for use. The problem, though, is actually garbage day. The wind blows the leftover trash all over the place and then really what’s the use? People even only slightly prone to littering will definitely use this excuse. I guess my yellow rose of Queens will always be a little wilted and that’s just a pity.
***Never mind that many treat people they love like shit on a regular basis. Spoil sport!
Last night’s Portable Comedy was quite possibly the best one ever. Jon Fisch stole the show. I’m going back in two weeks, so join me and Tex in the City on Friday, September 26th for another fun night of laughs and free vodka. Mention Tex in the City and get in for $5.00 rather than $7.00.
My feet must be made of leather. So many people were kvetching about their walk home on Thursday and the sad state of their feet. I walked four miles in 1.5 hours in four inch (motherfu*king gorgeous) heels with no problems whatsoever. Bet you want to suck my toes now, don’t ya? Thought so.
I’m really, really, really proud of Ehren and Roxy for pulling together Pale Idiot, a terrific show with a great ending, for the Fringe Festival. Congratulations!
Ann Richards during her speech: “Down in Texas, the gas prices have gotten so bad, wives have to form carpools to run over their husbands.”
“I’m Not Slowing Down until they put a picture of me on a Smucker’s jar and Willard Scott reads my name on the air.”
Jack to Ann Richards, reformed alcoholic: “Hey lady, move out of the way, some people are trying to get a drink.”
When walking home from work, I do not recommend these shoes.
Unlike the four hour, scary and lonely walk across the 59th Street Bridge on 9/11/01, it took me a mere hour to get home from Midtown and was shared with a friend from work. Quite a different adventure.
Christian and I bumped into each other in Astoria and decided to hang out on a rooftop where it was surprisingly cool. We enjoyed a candlelight dinner of pasta and wine, played cards, and talked of the stars and passing planes and laughed too hard about something silly. In other words, it was just like any other night we share together . . . only hotter.
So when people talk of yesterday it will forever be:
the day Tex in the City made the NY Times for the first time;
the day some guy knocked his head hard into the wooden security sensor at Barnes & Noble trying to check me out;
the day a NY Times fact checker wrote me regarding an item referencing Tex in the City in this Sunday’s edition of the NY Times. (Yeah, the edition that the whole world reads!);
the day of the Blackout of ’03.
We made history!
Check out Tina Louise at our party. Oh, and Maurice DuBoise with Alina Cho. Howzabout Puff Daddy’s Mama, Janice Combs, and how can I forget the lovely and sassy Ms. Ann Richards. Of course she was a gracious guest of honor and thanked Tex in the City (as an LLC and as individuals) in a nice little speech. She also spent some alone time with us in a private room after the party — just the four of us with the best lady ever. She’s so cool. The gift bags were a hit and as Chris Smith of the NY Times told me it was one of the best book parties he’d ever been to because it wasn’t full of pretentious haute monde. Yes, we are friendly and welcoming. It’s a curse.
By the way, it was 10 years ago today that I quit smoking. I haven’t had a single puff since. Yay me!
Guess what I saw in today’s NY Post during the many, many hours of reading many, many newspapers and books?
(Scroll down till you see a photo of the lovely former Texas Gov. Ann Richards and read the accompanying piece.)
Why, yes, that is another Tex in the City reference in Ms. Smith’s column. Thank you, Liz, and I hope to see you there on the 12th!
Catch Christian on Chappelle’s Show tonight on Comedy Central. It’s Mix Tape Vol. 2 which is a mix of the best sketches from the first season and Christian’s turn as Chadin “The Mad Real World” should be included as it was balls out funnier than anything I’ve ever seen.
He’s in Montreal this very moment pretending to be single on a show called “Dating It” during which he’ll go on a speed date with someone and then engage in some other crazy “antics” which, during the NY show last April, included him vigorously* making out with his date.
Meanwhile, I’m busy plucking random hairs by their roots in an effort to gain a sense of control. I hope he’ll still love me when I’m bald**, unless, of course, he elopes with his speed date in an effort to gain dual citizenship. Why wouldn’t he? I hear poutine is delicious.
*Word choice of Colette Hawley, extremely hilariousand chic host of Dating It.
** No, I don’t suffer from trichotillomania. It’s the poor girl’s Brazilian wax!
What an incredible day. I absolutely get off on giving people things. Really, I do. Free tickets are, of course, extra special. But I get off on giving people homemade shrinky dink key chains, Stoli pens and cards, nights out on the town and things like that.
Then, all in one day, I got free breakfast, free lunch, free after-work drinks and free dinner. AND, to top it off, free Yankees tickets. Damn. Give and you shall receive.
My drink companion tonight is the president of a certain television network. When asked how his job / business is doing, he said, “Since I was hired, we’ve had 9/11, two wars and a recession. Things are looking up.” Let’s hope he’s right.