>In Spiderman 2, "Doc Ock" really should be named "Doctopus".

>At last night’s Eating It I was picked up by an tiny, older Taiwanese guy who spoke maybe four words in English. “Tall” and “beautiful” were two that he really had a grip on. I tried to pawn him off on another very tall american girl but he just tried to get us to kiss. She bolted and he followed me around. I introduced him to various people who would say things like, “You have no clue what I’m saying, do you?” To which he would laugh and dance the twist in place. He must have grown impatient because he finally asked, “Ho ho? Ho ho?” I inquired, “Ho ho? What do you mean? I don’t get it.” He gestured to me, then to himself and then to the door, “Ho ho.” “Oh, no, I’m sorry I can’t go with you. I have a boyfriend,” I replied pulling Christian in closer. Christian said, “No you can’t ‘ho ho’ with my girlfriend. She’s mine.” He understood that perfectly. He was out faster than a jackrabbit stud in a bunny farm.

Mike & Ken would like you to know about this party. I haven’t RSVPd yet, but I probably will. I like Siberia and want to meet more people. I simply do not know enough to satiate my social needs quotient.

—Kambri

Ho in Taiwan.