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>* Christian nearly got killed by a Marine while headlining at the Stardome in Alabama. Read his account.

* Maybelline is, in fact, a Maybelline! Yay! My confidence is bolstered. Indeed I do know what testicles are be they the rabbit variety or not, and I did not, in fact, see any on her just as I suspected. I should never have listened to the naysayers. She gets spayed a week from Wednesday in a very quick out-patient procedure. She is in excellent health and is now running in circles on the living room shag.

* My ringworm is dissipating rapidly. My doctor never called so I applied Burt’s Bees Res-Q Ointment a few times and it practically vanished overnight!