Okay, so maybe it is not I who is Very Important, but I was with a Premium Blend alumnus which allowed me V.I.P. access to Comedy Central’s taping of the next season of P.B. The host was D.L. (Peeeee) Hughley. (get it, peee-hughley?) A bad, bad choice in hosts. He speaks as though his cheeks … More I am a V.I.P.
Catch Christian on Chappelle’s Show tonight on Comedy Central. It’s Mix Tape Vol. 2 which is a mix of the best sketches from the first season and Christian’s turn as Chadin “The Mad Real World” should be included as it was balls out funnier than anything I’ve ever seen. He’s in Montreal this very moment … More Plugging Away
Post Walden Pond, Christian’s great set at the Regatta Bar in the Charles Hotel and many beers, buffalo wings and chicken fingers, we crashed our pretty little heads on the best fu*king bed and bedding ever created on earth. I tried to stuff the down comforter in my bag, but the lush towels and terry … More Post Walden Pond
Before the start of last night’s movie, they played a commercial for Cover Girl’s Outlast All-Day Lipcolor. The ad’s storyline followed that of “Cinderella”. Dressed in pink and wearing matching Pearl Shade lipcolor, Cinderella was envied by the other ball attendees, because even after ten hours and despite having kissed the bachelor of every girl’s … More Truth in Advertising
When a woman gets breast implants, her tits become novelty items. She takes them to parties and whips them out like they’re the Deluxe Edition of Yahtzee. As a partygoer you want to partake in the game playing by poking them and squeezing them and thumping them like melons at a fruit stand because they’re … More Silly Putty Tits
My tub is miserably clogged and Liquid Plumber doesn’t do what it professes. I need to call my Super, but I’d rather shower in ankle deep stagnant water than come face to face with him. Why, oh why, dear God, did Stevie Wonder’s I Wish have to be so fun and funky? So after last … More May 26, 2003
So Bob and I covered many topics last night that will remain between us girls. However I will share with you the brilliant idea resulting from our discussion of Paquita’s exceptionally high libido and how I’m not that good at discouraging her –ahem– rubbing. (Hey, she doesn’t have much in life, let her have that.) … More Puppy Love
Last night I scored a ticket to an open bar fundraiser for a gay and lesbian charity. Wall-to-wall men and not a one of them looking at me twice. No lesbians to flirt with either. I threatened to wear a strap-on and start randomly poking people for attention. At the bar, I whipped out my … More Apr 26, 2003
Alan Greenspan is having prostate surgery today. Why is this news? Why not just say a “surgical procedure”? The only prostate I find myself daydreaming about (because that’s all I think of all day—a man’s prostate), isn’t on Wall Street. Frankly, I resent the media implanting the mental image of his engorged gland into my … More Apr 22, 2003
Spring time is a time for renewal. It’s a reminder that the cycle of life never stops. Fresh blossoms and green life sprout all around me. The birds and the bees comingle to spread new life. And, believe it or not, I’m buying into it. I’m smitten. And, dare I say it? I think I’m … More Apr 16, 2003
Kambri Crews 