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>It’s a Toss Up

>A freelancer for a national women’s mag is looking for non-experts on a piece entitled “The Best Advice I Ever Got”. Which gem from my Jailed Deaf Dad should I submit?

(A) Advice given to me when I was 16 going on my first date with a boy: “Don’t fuck.”


(B) Advice given to me from his jail cell, “Remember don’t take any dopes and heaving drinkers please.”


Decisions, decisions.