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>Just Sit There and Look Pretty

>This item in today’s Page Six reminds me of a Christian Finnegan joke about George W. Bush and his relationship with Dick Cheney:

Somebody get Nicolas Cage’s new wife, Alice, an American history book — and quick! Spies at the L.A. premiere of “National Treasure” last week said Alice, 20, seemed befuddled when someone talked to her about the Declaration of Independence. “She looked at them and said, ‘What is the Declaration of Independence?’ ” . . . Cage, 40, quickly came to the rescue and said, “I’m sorry — please don’t ask my wife any history questions.”

Continue reading Declare Her a Dunce! [Page Six]

Now compare Nic Cage’s real life to Christian’s bit:

George W. Bush is basically like that ex-girlfriend (or boyfriend, as the case may be) who you got along with in private, but you always avoided bringing to parties because you were afraid of the stupid shit that was bound to come out of her/his mouth. You know the feeling– she’s babbling to your friends about how she often suspects that she’s clairvoyant, and you’re silently screaming, “Shut up. Shut up. Please shut up. No… No… That’s not how that word is pronounced. Please stop talking. Please, for the love of christ. Fucking kill me now.” But then, someone like that prick France comes up to you and says “Dude…your girlfriend’s kind of an idiot.” And, all of the sudden, you’re like “Hey, FUCK YOU! At least I have a girlfriend!”


I hope Alice enjoys her “national treasure” while it lasts.