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Paquita is cute.

Unlike most chihuahuas, she’s friendly. Very friendly. Small. Happy. Talented. She garners unwarranted amounts of attention which bounces off her to me. As her voice, I graciously accept all compliments and answer the many inquiries as to age, weight, size, sex, etc. Usually I tell people her affinity for pigeon chasing, poop consumtion and arm humping. This makes people happy. As happy as Paquita. Occasionally, I fend off empty plastic bags, paper, leaves, etc. that blow her way by stomping on them and thwarting their attack. She is deathly afraid of objects hurtling in her general direction. Her eyes bug out, all four legs splayed…the brakes are full on! This makes me laugh. Laugh and laugh and I’m happy, too.

Today was no different. It was a breezy midday stroll with lots of blowing objects to destroy, sun shining, everything perfect, when some guy starts charging at us with his finger pointed like a gun. With a thick accent he declares, “BANG! I shoot her with my gun! BANG! BANG!” He was dead serious. The “guy” was a wee, 80-something, wrinkled, maybe 5′ 3″ Greek man. Now how do you respond to that? I warned, “You watch out! She’ll take your arm off!” Then I did my best imitation of a rabid pit bull. “ARRR WOOF! GGGGGRRRRRRR!” This made me laugh. Laugh and laugh. I guess he doesn’t like dogs. Weirdo.