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>Where to begin?

>Here’s an actual text message I sent to Christian while sipping Bud Light out of a can with a straw and watching some of the worst drag queens “perform” in a permanently parked double wide trailer that was converted into a bar:

“It’s 11:11 and I’m watching some dude in a bad wig suck seductively on a pickle while his bare nuts r expiosed and oh yeah he needs to shave his stubble so he pulls out an electric shaver.

pickles r only 50 cents!!!!!!!!!”

My man with the Norelco then jumped into the picture I took with Gina so I can share him with you, the Internet. His balls would just not keep to themselves much to my “shocked” delight.

I slept till 2:00 today before waking and trying to recall some of the more interesting moments of the night but, well, watching a nut-exposed man dressed like a woman shave himself at a bar while sucking on a pickle really takes the cake.

The Astros lost but it was still nice to get out of the hotel and see Minute Maid park. Baseball should be played outdoors.