<\/a>I spent today nursing my skin by hanging out in Central Park, reading, writing, drinking beer, eating hot dogs and nachos and watching Orthodox Jewish kids play softball in full Orthodox Jewish garb on one field and a bunch of rowdy old men play a double-header in full baseball uniforms on another. Team “Butt Spankers” won the first game. I didn’t stick around to see who won the second, especially after seeing one Butt Spanker rip his shirt off and start bumping chests in a show of aggressive foolishness. I wanted to shout to him, “You are middle-aged. This is for fun, remember?!” What kind of example was he setting for the little Jews?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Luaus are fun. Grass skirts itch the hell out of sunburnt skin, but luaus are fun. Once again, Sheila’s amazing rooftop served as the location and David Bowie and Iman still didn’t come over to join the fun…they just gazed at us longingly…their pretty, rich noses pressed hard against the glass. Losers. I spent today nursing my skin by hanging out in Central Park, reading, writing, drinking beer, eating hot dogs and nachos and watching Orthodox Jewish kids play softball in full Orthodox Jewish garb on one field and a bunch of rowdy old men play a double-header in full baseball uniforms on another. Team “Butt Spankers” won the first game. I didn’t stick around to see who won the second, especially after seeing one Butt Spanker rip his shirt off and start bumping chests in a show of aggressive foolishness. I wanted to shout to him, “You are middle-aged. This is for fun, remember?!” What kind of example was he setting for the little Jews?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,32,17],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/520"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=520"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/520\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5655,"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/520\/revisions\/5655"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=520"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=520"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kambricrews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=520"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}