I called off from work for the first time today. Even though I’m given the days as part of my “benefits” for being a corporate wage slave, I can’t help but feel terribly guilty and responsible when I actually use one. I wasn’t sick. No, I left my good umbrella in a cab last night and realized it just as the cab was pulling away. I screamed, “HEY! WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” No luck. The little red brake lights just got smaller. Damn!
So this morning I was stuck with this old-timey red model that I don’t even know how I acquired. I would never own such a thing. First, it has a wooden handle, one has to open it manually and it’s red. When buying umbrellas, I always get an auto open black jobbie. Always. But somehow, there in my apartment, rest a lone red, archaic umbrella.
Once I stepped foot outside I knew I was in for one heck of a commute. That was before I opened Carrot Top. I struggled with the contraption and managed to open it only to discover it covered nothing. Well, nothing except my head. No wonder its original owner abandoned it. In a drizzle it would have been fine. Today, it was not. Everything except the uppermost portion of my scalp was drenched in less than a block. I forfeited. Turned around and worked from home out of pure guilt till noon.
You’ve heard of someone burning a candle at both ends. Well mine happens to be a wee little tea light with about eight wicks. I’m this close to a nervous breakdown.