Apr 6, 2003

Have you seen The Pianist? I did on Saturday afternoon. If you haven’t, read no further.

The movie was very good; but, when watching a movie in Queens, it’s inevitable that you will get frustrated by the inconsiderate bastard assholes that have the nerve to take up space on this Earth. Where’s Darwin when you need him? I sat through two hours of cell phones, chatter, incessant scratching, and fidgeting in a very quiet, depressing movie. It was in the final dramatic scene when a woman with a thick New York accent and a husky voice, as though she’s been smoking since her days in the womb, loudly says to the screen version of Wladyslaw Szpilman:

“Take off the f*cking coat!”

Thanks, Lady, for breaking the tension. We needed that. By the way, Lady, did you know this movie was based on a true story written by Szpilman himself? No? Well, it was. You know what we can deduce from that? He LIVES. Whether he takes off the coat or not, he LIVES! So, shut the fu*k up!