June 30, 2002

What is with the word “egads”? Dictionary.com defines it as a mild exclamation. I ask, is there room in this world for a mild exclamation? After all, one is exclaming and Dictionary.com goes on to define an exclamation as “a loud calling or crying out; outcry; loud or emphatic utterance; vehement vociferation; clamor…” So, to be mild, must it be said at normal decibals or without much emotion? Then why exclaim at all? Could this oxymoron of a definition be the reason for its practical extinction from modern language? I’m going to start using it…shouting it even. The shock of it all! Perhaps I could cause a rebirth of egads and redefine its meaning entirely. After all, bell bottoms made a comeback. This proves anything is possible.

I may not be good at much, but I’m great at two things: star and vermin spotting. Could it be that it’s because STAR spelled backward is RATS? I wonder if I was a bird of prey in a former life. Today’s sightings included Bono on 61st between Park & Madison, Anne Heche on 5th Avenue & 60th Street with her baby boy, and a dead mouse on 55th & Broadway. Oh, what does tomorrow bring?