Lunch Time Follies

A Summarized Story as Told by Jack Yesterday at Lunch:
“Have you seen Jimmy’s new joke? Jimmy has this letter written by a man whose wife ran off unexpectedly. In the letter he begs his wife to return to him. She writes back saying she won’t be coming home as she is in Borneo and has found happiness and sends him a photo for proof. The picture shows her wrapped around a native with a schlong this big (gestures a size of about two feet long).

So Jimmy has been running around the office showing everyone this joke. Can you believe that? In the office!? I mean, how juvenile! Grow up! But what I really want to know is, how did Jimmy get a picture of my di*k?”

I’m lunching with Jack again today. O, what new quotes await me? We shall see.

…

Lunch was great. I still can’t wipe the grin off my face. Duck steak, chicken schnitzel and chopped prime rib at Shelly’s. Jack couldn’t stop talking about the Borneo photo and how hard it is to walk around with a horse-sized co*k. He gave us this little gem as we bundled up in our coats:

“So this Goyam walks into Saks and asks, ‘How much for the coat?’ The salesman says, ‘$1,500.’ The Goy says, ‘I’ll take it!'” Jack then laughed so hard his face turned pink. Hard to believe he’s 57 years old.